The 1970s were a time of disco balls, bell-bottoms, and bold social change. But while fashion and music were groovy, dating came with its own strange set of expectations. From outdated gender roles to jaw-dropping advice columns, the “rules” of romance often sound downright bizarre by today’s standards. Many of these 1970s dating rules were based on outdated ideas about gender, love, and what made someone “dateable.”
1. Women Should Never Call a Man First
In the ’70s, women were expected to sit back and wait for a man to make the first move, always. Calling a man, especially after a first date, was seen as pushy, desperate, or even “unladylike.” Magazines warned women that showing too much interest would scare men off. The advice was clear: if he likes you, he’ll call you—eventually. It’s hard to believe, but this hands-off approach was actually considered proper dating etiquette.
2. First Dates Had to Be Planned by the Man
Another of the strange 1970s dating rules was the expectation that only men could plan a first date. From picking the place to paying the bill, the guy had to take charge or risk seeming weak. Women who offered to split the check or suggest a venue were sometimes viewed as “too forward.” The pressure was high for men to impress—and for women to smile and nod. Equality in dating was still decades away from becoming normal.
3. No Kissing Until the Third Date
This rule wasn’t just a myth—it was printed in actual dating advice books. Kissing on the first or second date was seen as fast, even if both people felt a connection. The third date was supposedly the magic moment when physical affection became “acceptable.” But like most rules, it ignored personal chemistry and comfort levels. Looking back, it’s wild how a simple kiss had to be scheduled like a doctor’s appointment.
4. Double Dates Were the Safe Way to Meet
In an era before online dating, people often went on “double dates” to reduce the risk of awkwardness or scandal. It was considered safer and more acceptable for young women to go out in groups, especially with someone new. Parents often encouraged this practice, thinking it provided moral support and social proof. While not the worst rule, it added an extra layer of complexity to something already stressful. Today’s daters would likely swipe left on this group-only format.
5. You Had to Play Hard to Get
One of the most confusing 1970s dating rules told women they had to act uninterested to be appealing. Advice columns urged women to delay returning calls, refuse second dates quickly, or pretend to have “other options” just to spark jealousy. The idea was that too much enthusiasm was a turn-off. Ironically, this often led to mixed signals and missed opportunities. Authenticity clearly didn’t rank very high in 1970s romance playbooks.
6. Men Shouldn’t Date Women Who Were Too Independent
The women’s liberation movement may have been gaining traction, but old-school attitudes still ruled much of the dating world. Independent women—those with careers, opinions, or their own apartments—were sometimes seen as intimidating. Some men were advised to avoid these women altogether, fearing they wouldn’t be “nurturing enough” for marriage. This toxic idea kept many strong women boxed in or dismissed. Thankfully, we’ve come a long way in recognizing confidence as attractive, not threatening.
7. Saying “I Love You” Too Soon Was a Dealbreaker
According to 1970s dating advice, saying those three little words too early could doom your relationship. Love had a timeline, and if you jumped ahead, you were labeled clingy or emotionally unstable. Magazines even suggested rehearsing when and how to say “I love you” to avoid scaring someone off. Genuine emotion was sometimes treated like a social faux pas. It’s hard to imagine love being that scripted, but back then, it was a rule people followed.
Cringe or Classic? The Rules That Time Forgot
Some of these 1970s dating rules are laughable today, but others still linger in subtler ways. While society has made huge strides in gender equality and emotional honesty, remnants of these outdated ideas still show up in modern dating culture. The good news? We’re now free to ditch the scripts, set our own pace, and build relationships based on mutual respect, not outdated rules. So next time someone tells you there’s a “right” way to date, just remember: we’ve been there, done that, and burned the rulebook.
Which of these 1970s dating rules surprised you the most, or have you heard of even stranger ones? Share your thoughts and stories in the comments below!
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